Today’s Topic: The Food
Overall, we weren’t too impressed by the food we ate in Indianapolis.
Our hotel had an omelet bar at breakfast which sounded incredible when we booked the room, but the reality of the omelet bar was waiting in a 10 minute line which isn’t that long and yes, there are worse things in the world, but, well, it just wasn’t as awesome as it had seemed it would be earlier. Chris really made the omelet maker’s day each day by regularly requesting two egg white omelets “with a little cheese and all the vegetables”.
For lunch, most days we went to the Panera next door to our hotel and this was what I assumed Chris and I would do again on the last day of the conference when I said, “Hey Chris, when do you want to get lunch?” and he answered, “Let’s get lunch together after this talk,” and I thought, “Ok, good, we’ll get lunch together after this talk.” After the talk, as together we were leaving the conference center, I looked over and Chris was animalistically scarfing down multiple protein bars.
Me: “Um, didn’t we say we’d get lunch together after the talk?”
Chris (mouth full of multiple protein bars): “Uh, I got hungry. So I’m eating these. But I’ll sit and watch you eat lunch. OK?”
Me: “Yes, that is completely OK! It is my favorite thing to go to a restaurant with you and have you watch me eat food! I am thoroughly, joyfully glad I made lunch plans with you for today!”
Fine. I didn’t actually say that at all. That’s what a very patient, not hungry, all-forgiving fiance would have said. What I really said was more like, “Seriously? You’ll watch me eat lunch? When I confirmed with you naught but an hour ago that we were going to eat lunch together?” (Shut up, of course I really used the word “naught”). I then refused to talk to him much for several minutes because that’s what mature people do.
In my defense, it wasn’t that our not going to lunch together was such a huge deal per se; I know when he diets that there will be occasions when we “go to lunch together” but only I eat. But see, in this case, we had planned on going to lunch together, had planned on waiting to digest our food for a while, planned on going to workout together, and then planned on going to do some site-seeing activities with friends later in the day. By Chris eating “lunch” (animalistic bar consumption) at the conference center, he was (seemingly selfishly but clearly unintentionally) disrupting the whole schedule. If I now went to the crowded downtown Panera as planned, I wouldn’t finish my lunch for maybe 45 minutes after his protein bar consumption. This would put our digestion times totally out of sync, he would be ready to workout before me, he would finish working out before me, he would be showered and dressed and ready to do things way before I was, and I would be the one holding everyone up from site-seeing and I feel weird saying, “Sorry guys, had to eat, do some digestion, and get my workout in” because that sounds weird if you’re not a bodybuilder and actually it sounds weird even if you are a bodybuilder but at least people have a label to give you -“weird bodybuilder”- and they can accept that. Me, they’d just find irritating and inconsiderate for spending so much time digesting. And that was why Chris should have checked with me before chowing down on the protein bars immediately post-conference talk.
So how was this problem solved? Did Chris and I not speak for the rest of the trip? To answer the first question, I ended up eliminating the need for pre-workout digestion time by going straight from the conference to the gym and doing a quick high-intensity interval workout. Then I showered, dressed, and for lunch got some milk and snacks at the little shop in the hotel. I then digested these during the post-workout sight-seeing time. So yes, it all worked out. To answer the second question, no, Chris and I did not not speak for the rest of the trip. That means we did speak. And we enjoyed each other’s company and had a good time. Neither of us is any good at holding grudges against the other one which is really a wonderful skill for both of us to not be good at.
This post was supposed to be about food. So back to that.
Dinner one night was at a restaurant (that I will leave unnamed because I’m sure the restaurant reads this blog and I don’t want to get sued for not saying positive things about it) where we spent $22 each on “shrimp skewers” and got what you see below.
Is this for real? Perhaps the mondo broccoli head had to be transported all the way from Giant Vegetable Island and this jacked the price up?
All Chris had wanted from this meal was a nice big bolus of protein, some vegetables, and a decent serving of carbohydrates as this was a high carb (not crab) day. What he got was a tiny baby bolus of protein designed for someone who hates protein, a decent amount of vegetables, and maybe 20 total grams of carbs (not crabs). We ate the pittance, paid our $22, and then, disgruntled, walked to CVS to buy compensatory food to make up for this meal’s shortcomings.
The face of despair before a closed CVS
CVS was closed. Apparently, CVS in downtown Indianapolis did not understand that the restaurants near it were serving meals with inadequate macronutrient quantities and that it needed to stay open late to help the poor bodybuilders wandering the streets looking for protein boluses and carbs for high carb day. (Of course there must have been other bodybuilders wandering the streets for carbs too; no, we did not run into any).
Thankfully, the hotel store was still open. Pretzels were purchased and the carb situation was saved!
Pretzels save the day!
“What about the big protein bolus? Lindy, we are not stupid. You said he needed carbs and protein and we know pretzels are not a good protein source. How did he get the protein?!” you query.
He got his protein bolus from some protein bars he had back in the room.
And all was calm and good in the land of the bodybuilder as he finished his quest for foodstuffs with which to satisfy the daily macros.
Final Note: So you don’t leave this post thinking badly of CVS for not saving the day, I must mention that later in the trip Chris was able to obtain some of his beloved cottage cheese from CVS along with a special dieting bodybuilder treat of Diet Mountain Dew. Nothing says “good eatin” like Diet Mountain Dew and cottage cheese. Nothing.
Good Eatin’ Cottage Cheeses
Good Drinkin’ Diet Mountain Dew