Rotten Apples and The First High-Carb Day

Two points of interest to discuss today:

1) Why Chris eats rotten apples

2) The glorious first “high-carb” day

So, rotten apples.  Chris told me last night that he’s realized he needs to really carefully check his apples for firmness before he eats them.  He said that recently, he’s bitten into a few apples only to discover that they are grainy and have large dark spots inside them.  When non-bodybuilders, such as myself, discover that an apple we have bitten into is rotten, we generally stop eating and discard the apple, as this is an ingrained human reaction to rotten food.  Chris, however, fights this standard human survival function for the sake of daily-macro-counting peace.  Once he has bitten into the apple and discovered that it is mildly rotten, he then grits his teeth and finishes eating the rotten apple.  Why continue to eat it?

I will explain his “logic”. The apple’s place in his macros (grams of fat, carbohydrate, and protein) for the day has already been determined.  The apple could have been replaced prior to consumption but now that an unknown quantity has been consumed and an unknown quantity of rot remains, how will he know, at the end of the day, if he hit his numbers for the day?  The only other option he has besides finishing the rotten apple (and honestly I’m a bit surprised he doesn’t do this) is to simply weigh the apple prior to consumption on the basis that it could be rotten, weigh the apple after partial consumption should it prove to be rotten, subtract these two values to determine the quantity eaten, and then multiply the percentage of apple eaten by the total macro values of the apple as shown in the equation below:

[((Whole Apple – Uneaten Apple Part)) / Whole Apple](Macronutrient Values for Apple) = Quantity of Macronutrient Consumed

He would then need to simply compare these values to the value of macros he had desired to get from the apple and then search for a substitute food.  Who doesn’t love multi-parenthesied equations mid-apple eating?!

The difficulty lies in finding the substitute food I believe.  As he has a pretty good idea of what he’ll consume each week and has grocery shopped accordingly, finding an appropriate substitute food could be difficult.  His only option may be eating my food and that’s a dangerous option.

And that’s why my fiance eats rotten apples.

Should he commit to this apple?  Or will it be a meal of rot?

Should he commit to this apple? Or will it be a meal of rot?

Now we’ll discuss the second point of interest.  Today was Chris’s first “high-carb” day (ha, I just accidentally typed “high-crab” day which would be awesome if that’s what it really was.  “Yep, gotta go to the seashore; today’s my high-crab day.” But I digress).  High-carb days are the days Chris gets to eat more carbohydrates than usual.  During previous diets, these days have been cause for great joy and celebration.  I know today was a high-carb day because last night Chris excitedly asked me if I knew what tomorrow was.  I guessed the negative one year anniversary of our wedding (we’re getting married on May 24th, 2014) and he told me, “oh yeah, that too, but what else?”  And eventually he told me it was going to be a high-carb day because I’m not good at guessing things.

What is significant about today’s high-carb day is that last night’s conversation was the only indication I’ve had all day that today was high-carb day.  Usually, during previous diets, there was a lot of talk about the additional carbs being added to meals during high-carb day; these are exciting days!  But today, nothing.  I think the diet must be new enough and the memory of delicious meals of the past fresh enough that he’s not obsessing over high-carb day.  I’ll give him about two more months until they become exciting.  Stay tuned for posts on how future high-carb days go.  (And if any high-crab days get in there, I’ll let you know that too).

Maybe in a few month, once his carbs get low enough, he’ll stop being able to eat apples and eliminate that problem;  Or, more likely, he’ll be so hungry that he’ll enjoy rot;  I can just see it: “Lindy, come try these great brown apples!  You won’t believe the texture!”

Yep, we’ve got some fun to look forward to.

This is the pre-diet Wing Stop feast of last Saturday and the reason why high-carb day might not be super exciting yet.   (It'd be fun to lie and write that Chris ate all of this, but, actually, there were 4 of us).

This is the pre-diet Wing Stop feast of last Saturday and the reason why high-carb day might not be super exciting yet. (It’d be fun to lie and write that Chris ate all of this, but there were 4 of us).

One thought on “Rotten Apples and The First High-Carb Day

  1. Jamie

    I’m so excited about this blog, my friend! You crack me up + now I’ll actually know what you are up to (or at least what Chris is up to).
    P.S. Autocorrect changed “Jamie” (above) to “Jane” and I seriously debated leaving it so I could be an unknown commenter. But I did not, in fact, leave it as it turns out.

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