This afternoon, I pinched Chris’s fat and measured its thickness at various locations on his body. This is the kind of date we go on these days. Ha!
Back to seriousness, this is called taking skin-fold measurements. We were doing this to see how lean he is.
Skin-fold measurements are decently accurate at estimating percent body fat if you know what you are doing and have had sufficient practice. Being amazing, as I am, I do know what I’m doing and I have had sufficient practice.
I pinched and measured Chris at 7 different sites. We then put the numbers (in mm) that I got into 3 different equations which are all meant to estimate body density which can then be used to estimate percent body fat.
(I say “estimate” because no body composition method can exactly determine percent body fat; almost nothing irritates me more than someone bragging that he is exactly 7.52% or 9.43% body fat. No, you’re not. That is an estimate and you are in that range. Ditch the decimals. While we’re on the topic of body comp related things that irritate me, the phrase “lean muscle mass” is way up there. Think about what you’re saying you ridiculous supplement company or new workout fad promoter! There is lean mass and there is muscle mass but there is no “lean muscle mass.” Is there fat muscle mass? If I didn’t do your workout or take your supplement would I develop fat muscle mass? I don’t think so. So don’t ever say “lean muscle mass.” Ever. Or I will throw messy bodybuilder tanner all over you. Now, back to Chris and the skin-folds.)
It is stated in textbooks that the density of lean mass is 1.1 g/cm^3 while the density of fat mass is 0.9 g/cm^3. Using three different equations, we calculated Chris’s current body density at 1.089, 1.094, or 1.092 g/cm^3. Although of course those numbers are not his exact body density, the range of them all is pretty close to 1.1 g/cm^3, meaning, Chris is extremely lean.
When we calculated percent body fat from these numbers, Chris came out at 4.54%, 2.22%, and 3.31%. This means he does not have much body fat. (Again, it does not mean that he is exactly 4.54%, 2.22% or 3.31% body fat).
As far as taking his skin-folds went, it was interesting to see that I could get a good fat pinch from the subscapular site (on the mid back) but was clearly measuring just a double layer of skin thickness at the chest and midaxillary (under the armpit) sites.
Chris weighed 189 lbs. today. He is, once again, clearly the leanest he has ever been.
After we took the skin-folds, on the way home from work, Chris told me I smelled like salad dressing. I hadn’t eaten any salad dressing. Or even been around salad dressing today. The man is so hungry. Well, with his testosterone levels like they must be by now based on my previous case study of him, at least him thinking I smell like salad dressing could finally peak some interest in me maybe…
Oh, were you wondering if Chris had created a new spreadsheet to track changes in his skin-fold thickness measurements, body density, and % body fat in the off-season? Come on, you know the monster we’re dealing with here.
Please note that he titled the spreadsheet, “Offseason.” I thought spreadsheeting was ending with the show this weekend. I really thought that was the goal. But this is clearly a new spreadsheet and it appears that it will be used in the “Offseason.” I now think Chris may have an addiction to his spreadsheets. Along with the cinnamonologist recommendation for Chris that I asked for in a previous post (to cure Chris of his excessive use of cinnamon), I think I now need a recommendation for a good spreadsheeters anonymous group for him…